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Old 02-19-2020, 12:38 AM
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Default How to bond with my budgie

I have a situation and i dont know how to go about it.
My female budgie was hand fed, she is currently about 8 months. She is completely tame, always has been.
The problem is that she doesn't like to spend time with me. I dont know what to do. She will only come to me if i have food, and even then she won't always come. As soon as shes done eating she is fly or hop back to her cage.

I had two budgies before her. The first was a petstore budgie but I tamed her very quickly and she liked me. She would step up willingly, sit on my shoulder, and just enjoy sitting by me. She also liked to come over to me intentionally, sometimes she flew to me, and liked to sit on my shoulder and nibble on my hair (and destroy my clothes lol). I had a great relationship with her.
My second budgie (which i had at the same time as her) was a handfed male that was obsessed with people from the start (in a good way). I didn't have to tame him. He was the friendliest bird in the world. He always flew onto my head and loved to sit with me. He liked to fly out of his cage and sit by me while i was trying to nap. He hated it when i would leave him, and would keep flying back to me until i would have to force him into his cage. Even then he wouldnt get mad but would keep trying to come back to me. He learned to mimick some stuff and loved when i gave him kisses. He was an awesome bird.

But my first two passed away and i miss them terribly. I bought another girl 6 months ago and made sure she was handfed because I wanted her to like people. She cost me 18x more money than my first two because she is english, handfed, and i had her shipped. I waited very long to make sure i had the perfect budgie.

But I cant help but feel disappointed. It took a week for her to get used to me. After she was used to me, she let me give her head scratches which i was overjoyed about. She followed my boy around so it was all good.
But then my boy passed away a few weeks after buying her.
I always play with her and spend time with her. She learned tricks very quickly. She isnt scared of me at all, but i dont think she likes me either. We can have training sessions and she'll be crawling around me to do tricks and get treats, but as soon as we're done, shes leaves. She also stopped letting me give her head scratches.
Sometimes she'll be sitting on top of a cage relaxing but as soon as i stand up (across the room) she steps away and moves to the back of the cage, even if im not trying to touch her. Or if i do get to hold her, she turns her back to me. She wont ever step up willingly. It is such an opposite to my other birds. All I had to do was show them my hand and they loved to hop on, but this one runs away when she sees my hand, unless i have a treat, and I dont even know why. I dont do anything to scare her, i provide her with treats. I am not a newbie at taming birds and pets and i am extremely well and reading bird body language. I just dont understand why she doesnt like me.

What can i do to bond with her? She isn't afraid of people but simply doesnt enjoy being with me.
Quite honestly it hurts on an emotional level because my other two budgies were like my best friends. They loved me when i was sad and tried, and when i was happy. They liked to sit on my shoulder while i did homework. But this girl doesn't like to be with me at all. I lost my boy in december and getting over the loss is extremely difficult. Having this girl not like me makes it so much more difficult.

I am probably going to buy another English budgie in a few months, but it wont be handfed and will be closer to 4 months old. Im scared that he might influence her to become even less friendly. With my first two, they influenced each other to be friendlier, but im scared the opposite might happen here.
I just want to love her and have her love me back. But it isnt happening

What can i do?