I had a talk with mum this morning. I know she disagrees with rehoming so I wanted to bring her round to the idea that if things get worse with Buddy if might be best if we found an expert who could take him on.
She was having none of it.
She said a lot more than this but the basic, very clear and stubborn message was... No, it won't be happening. That's where she draws the line. Once you buy a pet they are yours for life, and you just have to manage things as best you can. If you can't give them the absolute best you just have to give as good as you can. This is her home and she is staying.
She doesn't get that I'm trying to put Buddy first, and do what's best for her... She feels like it's the absolute worst thing we could do.. I wish I could make her understand that I don't think I could bear seeing Bud stuck in a cage everyday (cos I'd only consider rehoming if it got to that stage), knowing that there may be someone out there that could handle her and have her out..
She doesn't get that the thing that should be an absolute no is having Buddy stuck in a cage never coming out..
Having the discernment to realize one's own limitations and to put the needs and overall happiness/welfare of a pet first is something that a person should not feel ashamed for.
In a last attempt, you could possibly show your mother the threads about your budgies.
If the decision is final, then you can continue to do your very best for both Buddy and Raffa. You can get Buddy a very large cage to better satisfy the need to fly/exercise and to continue the training by using positive reinforcement techniques to hopefully improve the bond and diminish the aggressiveness.
Best of luck with everything.
RIP sweet Tito (Summer 2008 - January 17th 2013).
You are missed and never will be forgotten.
I'm really sorry about the tough decision you may have to make but your budgies happiness and health is the most important thing! A happy healthy budgie is the best budgie. I hope you do what's best for your beloved budgies I wish you luck
Dare, I have two offers for you. One is first-hand experience with the potential benefits of rehoming for a bird who isn't doing well in its current home (I work with a rescue); if you ever think it would be beneficial to put your mother in contact with, please feel free to do so.
The other is for you to start a training journal for Buddy and let the community here help you. While you said that you have tried positive reinforcement with him, the details of getting it to work are not always that easy or obvious, particularly if you haven't done something like clicker training before.
The best thing for your budgie if not able to be out of the cage is to get the biggest cage possible I know that seems hard but when it's the only way that your budgie may be able to get play time and flight time it's the only option or giving the budgie another home because they need to be able to exercise their muscles in their wings.