I'm numb with pain and my other budgie Violet is in shock. When we got her she bonded with Blue so all she has known her whole life is Blue and now he is gone.
I feel like I'm still in denial but the tears won't stop. I had just ordered Aloe Detox yesterday and I thought to give it to Blue as a last resort but he left me before I could.
I feel like I have failed him.
Blue was still very active, flying around before he died. Despite all the tiredness and pain, he refused sit down on the bottom of the cage and did everything to stay on the perch. I eventually took him out and into my hands and he slept. He slept for an hour and then woke, trying to fly back to Violet. He was almost glued to Violet all morning, trying to be close to her as possible. He didn't make it to Violet this time though.
I was hysterical and my sister was crying too. My mom said he is at least free of his pain now. I still can't believe he is gone, my mind refuses to accept it. I have had him since 2012 and I was hoping to keep him with me for years to come. I never expected to lose him this soon. Lose him for the second time, only this time for good.
Back in 2012, Blue flew away and we all thought he had died. I still sat up posters in case there was slight chance he was still alive after spending two days outside in the cold. My whole family, and even my extended family, prayed for Blue. And then I received a phone call from a woman who said she had found Blue. Apparently Blue had flown over to a kid sitting on a soccer field who had then called for his mom, and being previous owners of budgies they decided to take Blue home with them. The woman told me a friend of her saw my posters and that's how she contacted me. Me and my mom immediately left to get him and it was Blue indeed. He looked tired and hungry. I paid the woman for finding and taking care of him and then brought Blue back home. Since we came on the bus, we decided to take a cab back. After a visit to the Vet, it turned out Blue had mites but was otherwise in good health. The vet was also impressed with how well Blue had survived outside. In the next couple of days, my other budgie Kiwi and Blue best friend, died. He had been long-term sick and despite all the treatments with antibiotics by the vet, he never got better. The vet suspected he might have had cancer.
Anyway, so shortly after returning home, Blue lost his friend and had mites. He had to stay at the Vet for a night as well. It was a lot or a small bird to take and Blue started clinging to me. He wanted to sit on me all the time.
After Blue got rid of the mites, we decided to get him a new friend, Violet. Unlike with Kiwi, Blue fell in love with Violet and became obsessed with her. He taught her different things and she followed him everywhere. We got Violet in 2012 as well so Blue and Violet stayed together almost 6 years. It was very evident that they loved each other a lot. Blue especially adored Violet to bits. Whenever she was scared or feeling unwell, he would always try to make her feel better. For him she was his whole world, even to the very end, he heard her voice and tried to fly to her.
My pain of losing Blue can't be put to words. Whenever he was on me or close to me he would purr. And one time I was crying so hard and Blue came sat in front of me and started chirping. I suddenly forgot everything and felt a wave of love in my heart. I realized Blue loves me back and our love in unconditional. In the last few days, Blue has been very close to me and giving me these sweet looks. I think he knew he was going to leave soon and that is why he showered me and Violet with so much love despite being in pain.
But no matter how great my pain is, I know Violet is feeling much worse. She lost her mate, her sense of security and her best friend. She is feeling alone since she never really bonded with me but with Blue. Blue was the bridge between us and now he is gone. I hope with time Violet will grow closer to me since I'm not planning on getting any more budgies now.
I still am in denial. I still think he is alive. I probably will for a while.
Anyway, thank you to you guys for all the help and tips. And most of all, for listening. I don't have any friends, Blue was my best friend, so it's nice to have this forum to come to where everyone understands where I'm coming from. Understands my grief.
Rest in peace my beautiful angel. You were my soulmate and I still never forget you. You saved me in so many ways and brightened up the house. Your singing was the first thing we heard in the morning and until the sun went down. It's so quiet here without you. I miss you so much. Thank you for bringing so much joy into my life. I will remember you as long as I live.
Goodbye my friend. And one day.. We will meet again. Hopefully.
Somewhere Over the Rainbow by Israel Kamakawiwo'Ole - YouTube