Tommy was my best friend for nearly 15 years... I got her when I was 9 and I was 23 when she passed away. What can I say? Words really can't describe how much she meant to me. I grew up with her... and we did nearly everything together. Tommy was incredibly trusting, and we really did understand each other.
When she died I fell apart. I was expecting it anyway due to her age but nothing could have prepared me for the moment when it actually happened. The first night without her was terrible. I used to take her up to my room with me every night and we'd fall asleep together...
It's been three months now, and I'm still trying to come to terms with it. I mean, I grew up with Tommy. I just cannot believe she isn't coming back. That I can't be with her anymore. You guys will understand more than anyone that these aren't just little birds but extremely close friends. I wish more people out there would realize that.
This past week, I finally felt ready enough to get a new friend called Penny. She's lovely. But Tommy will always be number one in my heart. My first. The one who grew up with me.
I'm so sorry for your loss of Tommy, Sophie. I can relate to how you feel as I have loved and lost. All I can really say is that time does help, although I think you will always carry with you a broken heart to some degree, filled with memories, both good and bad, of your time together. Hopefully one day you will be able to focus on those good times more than the loss and you will be left with a feeling of comfort, and ultimately acceptance.
Kudos to you for opening up your heart again to another special little budgie. Penny is definitely in great hands with you and your kindness.
Whenever you feel this sadness always think first ...15 years! That is an amazing life span for a captive budgie!!. Think of how wonderful of a parent you were to Tommy and how great her life was with you. Her longevity attests to this!! I hope I can have my first baby that long or longer!
I have only had mine for 2 months and I can't imagine not having him just after this amount of time so I cannot imagine how you feel =( I hope Penny and you make a really wonderful bond! You deserve it
Sophie, I feel exactly what you are going through. When I lost my 11 year old budgie Jake in February of 2007 I can't tell you how painful it was and how long it took me to accept the fact that as you stated, he just wasn't with me anymore. He was a free flight bird with a 25+ word vocabulary and I sincerely believe we actually had a dialogue of sorts. I will never really get over losing him.
Three days ago I lost my second budgie which I rescued from some bad people. He was wild when I got him but two years later we were inseparable. I as you, am still trying to deal with him not being in the house. I still think about where he is and his safety every five minutes only to remember he's gone. Losing a budgie is the most difficult thing I've ever had to go through. They are such amazing beings. They are gregarious nearly all of the time, and they even seem to be able to read your mood and feelings.
Enough about me and my birds. I was just re-enforcing and confirming that the feelings you have just go to show what a great budgie owner you are and the great life you gave to Tommy, and he gave to you.
I'm glad you have gotten to the point where you are giving another lucky budgie a wonderful life. I know it takes time to convince yourself it's okay and not to feel guilty as if you are "replacing" your lost loved one. I still haven't gotten to that point yet, but I know it will happen when the time is right.
Fifteen years is a long time and the fact that you and he grew up together made you both even closer. I wish I could say more to make you feel better. Acknowledging your losing Tommy makes me realize that there is really nothing we can do when it's time so we need to cherish every moment we have with our dedicated, bonded wonderful budgie! I think that's the key. Best wishes to you and feel better- your pictures of Tommy show what a wonderful and caring parent you were, and will be to your new baby. Keep us posted !!! - Mark
Losing a friend of 15 years is very hard emotionally. It is perfectly natural for you to think of Tommy and miss her each day. She will always be with you in your heart and soul. She would be happy , I think, that you have found a new friend in Penny. I hope you have as many or more happy years with her that you had with your beloved Tommy.
Cutie Pie, Olive, Budgie, Baby Boy, Star, Pepper, Ariel, Oscar, Charlie, Little One, Chiclet.
Cutie Pie, Olive, Ariel, Little One and Chiclet are children of Budgie and Oscar.
Budgie and Star left us in 2009. Pepper and Oscar left us this year, 2010. 2018 and all are gone. Ariel and Cutie Pie died this Feb and March. Both over 11 years old.
A good day is a day all your birds are happy and healthy.
Thank you so much for the kind words, guys. I'm so glad to have found these forums and a wonderful bunch of people who understand what it's like to lose our dear friends. It makes it that much easier to cope. Tommy was a very happy bird who loved life and loved everyone around her, and I'm convinced it was her generous spirit along with our unbreakable bond that kept her going for so many years.