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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
Hi everyone, and thank you for coming to read my post! :yellow face:
(I need help!!)

About 6 months ago or so I got a second bird because my first bird was left alone for a more than 8 hours a day. I thought this would be a good idea to keep her company, and eventually have them both in the same cage if they were to form a bond. :love2:

The opposite kind of happened. The second bird, Lulu, didn't get comfortable with any of my taming techniques that I tried with my first bird, Bibi. Now she still fears me when I come closer to the cage. She is used to me, but don't think she really trusts me yet. Bibi on the other hand was tame after 2-3 months of taming. Maybe it's because I had more time to spare with Bibi than I did with Lulu.

Issue is now that: Lulu is not at her full comfort or happiness (she still shys away from me, doesn't talk much, or doesn't do much). I am very concerned for her. What should I do and how should I approach it?

Also, I have tried to introduce them both. When I first got Lulu, I was still living in a bachelor apartment (now living in a one bedroom) and so the two bird were right next to each other - I couldn't bring Lulu in a different room alone to train and tame her, like was suggested. I used to bring her into the bathroom to spend some alone time with her without my other bird so she would get used to me, but she didn't and I didn't want to scare her, so I stopped. And when I moved into my new apartment, I kept her in a different room to see if she could get used to me without being around Bibi, but I think she just got a bit depressed being so alone instead... So now they are both in the same room again, in the dining room. Both cages on each ends, but close enough to sort of chat and Bibi will often fly out to Lulu's cage once she's out (no, Lulu doesn't get out of her cage yet, I am so afraid she would never make it back because she seems so scared of me. Bibi will just hop on my shoulder or my hand whenever).

Sorry about the long message! :blink:

The last thing is that they're not really getting along as well as I'd hope. When I put Bibi in Lulu's cage so they can hang out, Bibi gets extremely defensive over what's in Lulu's cage, and it's not even her/his stuff!!! (No, I still don't know Bibi's sex. Although, it's certain Lulu is female).

Anyway, they don't seem to get along. Lulu doesn't like me. They both seem kind of sad now. Bibi is even losing her bond with me even if she's not even that close with Lulu. I am looking for any suggestions on taming, bonding, etc. It breaks my heart and at this point I am unsure what to try anymore... I feel so unmotivated... Feels like I can't help them.

Please help me. And my budgies. :sad:

- Corissa

55,347 Posts
Taming and Bonding with budgies requires time, patience and a regular and consistent schedule.

Do you have the time each day to devote to helping Lulu become more comfortable with you? If so, you will need to start over from the beginning with her. By that I mean sitting next to her cage and reading, singing or talking to her for 10-15 minutes at a time three or four times a day.

After the 2nd or 3rd day, rest your hand on the outside of the cage when you talk to her so he'll learn that your hand is safe and will not hurt her.

After a week, rest your hand inside the cage when you talk.
Don't make sudden moves, don't try to touch her.
Let her get used to the idea that the hand is now in her safe place and not harming her.

After 2 weeks, begin moving your hand slowly toward your budgie. If she becomes agitated, stop moving your hand and just hold very still until she calms down. When she's comfortable with your hand near her, you can offer her a bit of millet or a few seeds. In a few more days, you can begin your taming and bonding sessions.

Always work at your budgie's pace.
Move slowly and talk reassuringly and calmly to her whenever you interact with her.

There is no guarantee the two budgies will bond.
However, once you have reached a point where you feel confident in letting Lulu have out-of-cage time, you can try introducing them in neutral territory (outside either cage) to see how they get along.

You can do this several times. If they seem to do well together outside the cages, then you can leave both cages open during the out-of-cage time and let them decide if they both want to go into one cage together.

Additionally, I would recommend you read the stickies in the Taming and Bonding section of the forum.

Super Moderator
18,016 Posts
Hi Carissa,

I agree that you need to spend more effort starting over with your little ones rather than continuing the path you're on. For budgies who are skittish, it's important to start from the beginning and stay there as long as they need it. It's definitely not all about physical interactions, like stepping up. ;)

The base of trust is built on many things, and the best way to begin to gain and regain their trust is to spend lots of time just sitting by their cage talking to them, reading to them, and including them in your activities, like doing your work next to their cage. Playing soft music as you talk to them or sit by their cage and do something will help for them to relax around you. :thumbsup:

FaeryBee has given you wonderful advice. I hope that your two budgies are able to get on with you better as you work through some of these techniques.

Meanwhile, we'd be happy to officially determine the gender of Bibi, if you'd like to post full-frontal photos of her taken with no flash and in natural daylight.

Also, be sure to read through the forums as there is lots of information that the forums have to offer with regards to best practices for budgies! If you have any questions afterwards, we'd love to help you!

Cheers, and good luck! :wave:
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