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Astrobunnies 12-28-2018 06:26 PM

Second thoughts on euthanasia
So my budgie was sick for over 2 months. She went from weighing 38 grams to weighing 33 within that time. There were tons of vet trips and in the end they said they thought she had either PDD or liver problems. She had been on metacam for about 3 weeks before today and the vet told me we would need to increase the dose and put her on other antibiotics as well. She was already on baytril and one other antibiotic for a couple weeks because of bacteria in her droppings and the bacteria cleared up and came back. She was sleeping a lot and vomiting. I was told it was unlikely she would get better and I decided to get her put to sleep before she got worse. Now I feel bad because there was still a chance even though it was small that she could have recovered. She was only 2 years old. I can't stop crying and blaming myself. I am so upset knowing she might could have gotten better if we found medicine that worked for her. I know its too late now, I can't bring her back but I just don't know if I can forgive myself or not.

FaeryBee 12-28-2018 07:31 PM

You did the right thing by allowing the vet to help your budgie move on to the Rainbow Bridge.

While it is never an easy decision, when an animal's quality of life has greatly diminished and or it is in constant pain and suffering, then allowing it to move on in its journey is the greatest and most self-less gift of love you can give.

I know how difficult it is. I've had to have many of my dearly beloved pets (dogs and budgies) helped along in their journeys over the years.

Although you are sad right now, try to accept that your budgie is no longer in any pain, she is no longer sick and she is no longer suffering.

Your little one is whole, healthy and happy as she plays at the Rainbow Bridge and is very grateful to you for allowing her to leave the pain and sickness behind. :hug:

If you want to chat about this, you may feel free to contact me via Private Message.

RavensGryf 12-28-2018 10:26 PM

Deborah is absolutely right. I know it’s extremely difficult, and in these situations it’s quite common for people to blame themselves. You did the right thing under these circumstances. :hug:

Astrobunnies 12-28-2018 11:07 PM

Thank you guys so much. Even though there was a slight chance she could have recovered, you still think it was the right thing to do? I didn't want to chance her suffering really badly but at the same time, if she could have gotten better then maybe she could have lived a few more years.

philw 12-28-2018 11:15 PM

Don't beat yourself over your decision. Although you provided much veterinary treatment, that continued to be adjusted based on the good and not so good response, in small birds and often birds in general, antibiotics take their toll on other systems, which makes treatment increasingly difficult not just for the vet, but also you and especially your bird.
You made a decision, that gave final relief to her struggle. To me, in this situations, it was what was best for her. Everyone who's had to make these decisions, understand how painful it is, but it was the best thing to do for her.

FaeryBee 12-29-2018 08:48 PM

There is no question at all in my mind that you did the right thing for your budgie.
I would have done the same in your position. :hug:

Astrobunnies 12-29-2018 10:08 PM

Thank you guys so much. It really means a lot to me that you guys think I did the right thing. I felt like it was the right thing when I did it but I think I am questioning it now because I miss her so much and wish she could still be here. I am happy to have you guys to talk and relate to because my family just doesn't get it at all. They keep expecting me to just not be sad anymore already and it just happened yesterday. I miss her so much though so I know it will take a while for me to stop being sad. You guys are so nice. <3

FaeryBee 12-29-2018 10:15 PM

You are right that you are questioning yourself because you miss her.
It's fine that you are sad and would be strange if you were not. :hug:

Grief is a very personal experience and each individual grieves in their own unique way. Striving to honor aging and death as a part of the cycle of life may not diminish the pain and sorrow we feel when our loved one is no longer with us, yet it can help us accept that birth, life, and death is the way of all creation.

I believe during times of grief it is important to focus on the positives of the time spent with the beloved person or pet who has moved on in their journey.

Concentrating on gratitude for the blessings given through whatever amount of time one had with their loved one turns emotions away from feeling sorrow for one's self and brings the focus on the joys of the memories we shared. Although we miss having that person/pet as part of our day to day existence, and the time we had always seems too brief, giving thanks for the time we were given is the first step in healing the pain and sorrow.

It is because of Love we Grieve
Because of Love we are also comforted
in our Sorrow

In Memories, may you find Healing
In Time, may you find Peace
In the Power of Love, may you find Comfort

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